Taylor Swift is Paddleboarding with Some Pasty Brit in a Shitty Bikini of the Day

Taylor Swift has a long lean body…and lately, I’ve been finding her hot, but for some reason, every time she gets into a bikini, which happens every once in a while, she’s rockin’ these old lady form fitting, belly hiding, gunt/muff gut shaping bottoms that just look fucking clown-like.

She rocks these so much, that I am convinced she’s hiding something from us, maybe a freakish birthmark, or damage from all the sex she’s had, or even a scar, or testicles, or who the fuck knows, a twin she ate and hasn’t had removed because it gives her her demon powers to manipulate the youth, or a tattoo….

There is something behind this constant high waisted bullshit, and someone needs to get to the bottom of it…like it’s one of life’s great mysteries, which it is, cuz right now, as I stare at it…it is all that fucking matters..and it’s confusing me, turning what could be hot, into something horrible…

I mean she’s in her 20s, get her some Brazilan cut shorts yo!

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